Grades, Parallels and despondency

So the much-dreaded/awaited grades are out. And oddly enough, I still top the class(B.Techs at least), notwithstanding the stellar performance of a classmate of mine over the last 2 years! Mixed feelings...I clearly don't deserve this spot. The overall topper, highly deserving, of course, can not turn cog in the wheels of my app-plans.

Complacency, however, is an unwelcome customer at these doors.... Should I thank my stars competition has been so lacklustre, or try to blame it on the grading/raping pattern of the department itself? I tread gingerly. But one thought surfaces over and over.... this should have been my best semester, but higher powers conspired to dispel the fond pipe dream.

I peruse the above lines, and nausea sets in. How I loathe this book-keeping as the semester draws to a close! Point oh four down, point not two up..... the struggle to rise above these petty nothings rages. And yet, there is the noble adage of mine "There is no excuse for poor grades".

To hell with them, with expectations, say I. "If only....." whimpers a small voice from within..."a 10...some semester..." The old yearning makes a return, with added fervour. Time is running out. 2 semesters to go, and not much leeway to realise that fantastic vision...

The tired old resolution... "Next semester is gonna be different. Take no trial lightly.." The deplorable system, where objectivity in performance assessment is sacrosanct....convinces me otherwise. But the hope lingers, and the shadow warrior trudges forth.

And sometimes, when I contemplate how easily priority-reversals cloud our vision, I think of the C&H strip:

and I smile again!